Skinut ću sa sebe svoju kožu
i isprat ću od sebe svoje tkivo
sve naslage prljave i taloge nečiste
izbacit ću iz svoje nutrine
i ništa neću ostaviti da bude moje
mene je ionako previše
u svemu što me okružuje
iscijedit ću iz sebe svoju žuč
i snagu ću svoju darovati drugima
svoju ljubav i svoju tugu
razbit ću o kamen
i njihove krhotine neću pokupiti
svoju radost i svoje užitke
poklonit ću raspjevanim pticama
one će znati bolje od mene uživati
i radovati se u svojim igrama
ni suze svoje neću zadržati za sebe
pozvat ću crne udovice neka ih one isplaču
njihovim blijedim i hrapavim obrazima
one će bolje pristajati nego li meni
koji sam već odavno prestao plakati
i od snova ću se svojih oprostiti
razdijelit ću ih ubogim
i zaljubljenim djevojkama
njima su oni potrebniji nego li meni
koji sam već odavno pokidao
sve njihove haljine
svoje ću udove razbacati po brdima
po proplancima, planinama i šumama
neka ih divlje zvijeri glođu i ljušte
svojim oštrim čeljustima
svoje ću ruke baciti ludim dječacima
neka njima udaraju o oštre kolnike
kada budu trčali strmim
i prašnjavim cestama
sve ću svoje zbaciti sa sebe
i neću ostaviti ništa da bude moje
a onda kada ostanem sam
bez sebe, bez ičega
onda ću i sebe već baciti negdje
te skočiti u čistu vodu
i otploviti
daleko, daleko,
daleko...
1992.
Vinko Kalinić
I will buck off all of mine
I will take off my own skin
and rinse off my own tissue
all dirty sediments and unclean residues
I will throw out from my own interior
and I will not leave anything of mine
however there is too much of me already
in everything that surrounds me
I will extract my own bitterness
and my own power I’ll donate to others
my own love and my own sorrow
I will smash at the rock
and I will not pick up their debris
My own joy and my own pleasures
I will give to lilting birds
they would better than me, know how to enjoy
and rejoice in their plays
not even my tears I would withhold for myself
I will call the black widows so they can mourn them
it would suit their pale and rugged cheeks
much better than it would suit me
who has quit crying long time ago
and I will farewell my dreams
I will give them away to the miserable
girls who are in love
they need them more than I
who has torn all their dresses
long time ago
all my limbs I will scatter over the hills
through the glades, mountains and forests
so the wild beasts can gnaw and scale them
with their sharp jaws
my own arms I will throw to the mad boys
so they can smash them on the sharp pavements
when they would be running down the steep
and dusty streets
I will buck off all of mine
and will not leave anything of mine
and then when I stay alone
without myself, without anything
then I will throw myself somewhere too
I will then jump into the clear water
and I will sail away
far, far,
far away...
and rinse off my own tissue
all dirty sediments and unclean residues
I will throw out from my own interior
and I will not leave anything of mine
however there is too much of me already
in everything that surrounds me
I will extract my own bitterness
and my own power I’ll donate to others
my own love and my own sorrow
I will smash at the rock
and I will not pick up their debris
My own joy and my own pleasures
I will give to lilting birds
they would better than me, know how to enjoy
and rejoice in their plays
not even my tears I would withhold for myself
I will call the black widows so they can mourn them
it would suit their pale and rugged cheeks
much better than it would suit me
who has quit crying long time ago
and I will farewell my dreams
I will give them away to the miserable
girls who are in love
they need them more than I
who has torn all their dresses
long time ago
all my limbs I will scatter over the hills
through the glades, mountains and forests
so the wild beasts can gnaw and scale them
with their sharp jaws
my own arms I will throw to the mad boys
so they can smash them on the sharp pavements
when they would be running down the steep
and dusty streets
I will buck off all of mine
and will not leave anything of mine
and then when I stay alone
without myself, without anything
then I will throw myself somewhere too
I will then jump into the clear water
and I will sail away
far, far,
far away...
Vinko Kalinić
(Translated
by Darko Kotevski)
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